The Real Online Dating Experience Series: Male Case Study 2 (Interview #2)

The Real Online Dating Experience Series: Male Case Study 2 (Interview #2)

First, click here to find out everything you need to know about this series.

Then, read the previous interviews to catch-up.

Previous Interviews:  Male Case Study 1: Interview #1 (Introduction), Female Case Study 1: Interview #1 (Introduction), Male Case Study 2: Interview #1 (Introduction)Female Case Study 2:  Interview #1 (Introduction), Male Case Study 1: Interview #2 (Profile and First Matches), Female Case Study 1:  Interview #2 (Profile and First Matches)


Male Case Study 2:  Interview #2–Profile and First Matches

Obsidian breaks down the approach he used to write his unusual profile.

Did you use humor in your profile?

Q1:  What was your mindset and how much effort did you put into writing your profile?

Obsidian:  Nothing.  I didn’t put any effort in it. I tried to be funny about it.  I said I was 4 feet 10 inches with a wooden leg and that I weighed 285 pounds.  I did that with a purpose.  Instead of looking at external looks, it was important for me to find a God-fearing woman because I wanted her to be an example for my daughter.

Q2:  Profiles with photos are said to get twice as many responses.  How did you feel about posting your photo?

Obsidian:  I started reading the profiles, and I took my picture down.  The profiles I read by women…they would say what they liked in a man.  They’d say a things like a kind man, family-oriented, etc.  So I put it to the test.  I said that I was the most hideous looking man but that I had the values they were looking for. I wanted to see if they were true to what they said they wanted. I wanted to see if they were shallow.  I really made it a point to try to filter out the ladies who didn’t really mean they wanted a man with the qualities I knew I had. Then if the ladies responded to me, I would send them a picture because I knew they were true to what they said…If all they did was describe men with strong characteristics—a provider, a strong man—I would send them my photo after a few exchanges or when they requested it.  The majority of them would laugh.  I had one lady who actually said she felt relieved because she was going to feel shallow if she didn’t talk to me.  A lot of women think men are shallow and we are, but women are very shallow too, in my opinion. [Well that’s honest.  I can’t really argue with that. I know it’s true in some cases.]

Q3:  What was the experience like when you saw your first matches online (for any site)?

Obsidian: I thought, damn!  I should’ve been doing this a long time ago. [You know there’s lots of laughter after this statement.]

Q4:  Describe your habits—how you interacted with a site process and with your chosen matches?

Obsidian:  I was traveling. So about every two or three days I’d log on.  If there were question, I’d respond.  When I was on, I’d respond to four or five different ladies.  I’d come back later in the week or a few days later.  I gravitated to those women who were humorous.

Q5:  Overall, did you like the process? Why or why not?

Obsidian:  Yeah, I liked it.  I just liked it.  People feel more liberated to be more honest.  When you speak face-to-face, some people try to be on their best behavior.  When you are eating nothing is in their teeth. [He’s so hilarious.  My side hurts from laughing.]  If they have to pass gas, they’d be uncomfortable.  But when you’re writing and email, you just relax and say what’s on the top of your head.  The way I talk is the way I type, but the majority of the people I meet…they would try to be on their best behavior.  Then two or three months later I’m like who are you? I don’t like you.


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